CSI: New York: Smooth Criminal

“When the stars threw down their spears
And watered heaven with their tears,
Did He smile His work to see?
Did He who made the lamb make thee?”

William Blake

Watching the CSI New York team is very worrying when you think that these guys are supposed to be the best of the best in New York.

In this episode, the team investigates a shoot-out in a bar which leads them to a fake-medicine scandal and the rapper Ne-Yo as a hired assassin.

Now that’s a sentence that I bet no-one has ever written before.

What annoys me most about CSI in general is the way that the investigators seem to talk past each other. In other words, in order to get the requisite information across to the audience, they explain things that everyone else in the scene already knows, or, at least, should already know. Otherwise America is in a lot more trouble than I thought.

Also, when someone says “That’s sad,” they should at least look sad.

CSI isn’t really a traditional murder mystery show, because the audience almost always knows the answer before the investigators do. It’s not as if we are working it out along with the team; basically, what we are doing (or at least what I am doing) is laughing at them going, “Come on, it’s so obvious a monkey could work it out!” Well, at least a monkey that is not personally involved with the case. The members of the CSI team appear between them to have a personal connection with absolutely everyone in New York.

Really, I watch CSI (on occasion) to laugh at the clumsy dialogue, the badass one-liners that nobody would ever say in real life, and the general ineptitude of New York’s best and brightest. Not to find out how it turns out. The scriptwriters have failed there, I’m afraid.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s